In an attempt to shake off the media circus ensconced outside his home, Peter Alfie Roland Dilon Edwin William (P.A.R.D.E.W.), my pet dog, has joined the list of sentient beings ruling himself out of the race to be the next England manager.
The three-year-old reaffirmed his commitment to the Cambridge Kennels but admits he would like to see the job go to an English breed, hoping a deal can be agreed to appoint Harrier.
Although Durham boss Harrier is the clear favourite to take the job, PARDEW has enjoyed a strong season at Kennelside, guiding the Hounds to fifth place in the Canine League.
His previous achievements include reaching the KA (Kennel Association) Cup final with unfancied Hull but, despite an impressive CV, which could see him considered, the former Terriers United boss does not wish to abandon what he has started with the Hounds.
"Firstly, as an English dog, I'm proud to be in that sort of frame, but it's not for me and I'll make that quite clear," he barked to reporters. "I'm not even in the running as far as I'm concerned.
"I'm very, very happy here at Cambridge, we're on a little project here that's going really well and I want to see it through. And the passion and everything about this place is why I want to stay here."
"I do want it to go to an English dog, just on a personal level," PARDEW said. "That's important this time. I really, really hope Harrier and club themselves out and can do it in a manner that it works for everybody."
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